i like my bike.

This weekend, Ben, Molly, and I ventured to Eau Claire, WI for my grandmother's 90th birthday party. Knowing this meant Ben was missing riding his bike this weekend and was sitting in a car for 11 hours r/t for my family gathering, I made efforts to include our favorite things in the weekend. Sure, it was a long time in the car. But we also made a stop to see a train tunnel, had a nice hike in the woods, rode the Lowes Creek trails, and ate at Culver's. What's not to love?

Riding is frustrating though. Two reasons-- first, my lungs are smooshed and can't keep up with my legs. Hills? Yeah.... not so much. Second, my front/back balance is all screwy from this bowling ball, so I don't trust myself to stand and climb much and I sort of wimp out at some technical stuff. But I guess it's all to be expected. Don't take this as complaining, it just is what it is. I'm super thankful that this whole pregnancy thing has been easy enough that I can still ride trail at nearly-full-term, and I'm SO happy to have had that time in Lowes Creek- I love those trails!

So, we're at the "any day now" point. Sure, it's supposed to be about 3 more weeks, but statistically, we're inside the window. Hoping for sooner rather than later. Tonight Ben's going to finish up the baby room and I'm going to sew our ring sling. Things are pretty much ready.

Waddling along at speeds that might impress old people.

I don't know why I bother any more, but I'm still running. No, jogging. No, waddling. This morning I managed 3 miles with only 1/2 mile of walking. What once would have been shameful is now a great! victory! I just keep telling myself that every mile I make it through brings this baby closer to coming. Earlier.

The pregnant runner's bible includes a study on women who are runners or aerobics instructors and shows that if you keep it up through the birth and don't quit, the baby comes a safe and healthy average of a week or two sooner. I'm banking on that. Betting on it. I'm counting down to full term, not to 40w. Starting next week, all bets are off, and I'm going to do what it takes to have this thing (naturally) asap. I'm going to buy a blackberry, schedule the birth, and swallow the thing to make sure the baby gets the memo.

Last night Ben and I finished our 12th and final Bradley class. We're done! I have to say, it was 100% worth it, best decision we made. It seemed like it might be overkill, but I don't think that overkill is possible. You can't be too prepared! And really, it's been a weekly quality time together for us to really think about what's coming.

Looking forward to a family reunion this weekend in Eau Claire, WI. Ben and I are bringing our bikes and we'll be riding Lowes Creek. I love those trails, I'm super excited. I'll be avoiding the fast/hard stuff- not worth risking a fall- but the rest of it I'm going to really, really enjoy.

closer yet...

i keep writing things for here and then just deleting them. i'm busy, but things are just... pretty much everything I do now is either about or impacted by the alien I'm carrying around with me. less than 2 weeks to full term. With Ben leaving for Interbike right about when I'm due, we are VERY motivated to have this baby before the 40w mark. In that vein, we're taking any and all advice about things that will get things going... which has meant lots of time, effort, and odd supplements.

The thing I'm finding most odd about the last few weeks is the car seat. It's like that last small thing that will herald in the "this is going to happen, period." It's huge and takes up a lot of space, so we don't want it hanging around the hosue too soon. Once installed, it will take up 1/5 of the seating area in our car. We will need to get it soon, and we will need to install it at some point, but the timing on the car seat-- that's what's real. No pressure, right?

My running shoes, which I buy 1/2 size too big to allow for long-run feet swelling, barely fit. I have cankles. I made it through 4 miles this morning- walking less than a mile of it-- and three miles straight through yesterday. I can still run! Take that, the man.

...how many to go?

Saturday we went to Glencoe to cheer on Erica (whose birthday it was!), Ben, and the rest of the crew. It was hot. I couldn't even imagine racing in that. It was a great time, and a great day, but as usual, I walked away super happy that I'm no longer involved in officiating. Somehow a teammate who wasn't even there took a top-20 finish, and Ben, though he was told to pull off at the start/finish by the motoref, the pit ref, and at the finish line, was DNF'd. He was in the middle of 4 packs of racers and in no way even close to getting lapped. He shouldn't have been pulled, but he certainly should have been placed. Can someone tell me why it's worth paying $30 to race if this is what you end up with? And when he asked about it, they said they had "no record" of his laps or times, although the race was chip timed. Super frustrating.

Reminds me of a few weekends ago in Elk Grove, where a teammate who was riding in a group of 4 off the back of the main field was pulled by a certain official just laps into the race. The group was still racing eachother and was at the time in no danger of being lapped. They had paid $25 to race and got pulled waaaay early, and when they asked why, the official said "you would have been caught and lapped by the end of the race anyway." Really? They could have raced eachother for probably 10 more laps and then been finished a few laps early, not been in anyone's way, and had a far better experience.

Same dude that threatened to fine my team for violating a rule that didn't even apply to our event. And also forced us to pay for an extra official for one of our events for no reason at all really, claiming it would "enhance safety" but really it just meant one more bored, cold official sitting at the finish line at a price that had to be passed on to each of the racers.

This pregnancy isn't the reason I'm not officiating, it's people like that. I'll start working as an official again when leadership like him shows by example that it's about contributing to the safety, fun, and sportsmanship of the race and not just exercising some misplaced and overblown notion of "authority." It's completely out of hand.

Had to be said.

Anyway, Lyne came to stay with us for the weekend while covering the Glencoe race and we had a great time trying to stay cool. Sunday, Audrey, Lyne, and I enjoyed some great outdoors time and delicious dinner and just had a nice girls' day. I needed that.

At this point, I'm 2-5 weeks to go. In yet another hormonally-driven nesting binge, I re-arranged the diapers (OMG do we have like a bagillion prefolds!), washed all the used baby clothes we got, and went with Audrey to pick up a lovely rocking chair. We're slowly whittling away at that insane to-do list. Still need lighting and a rug in the baby room, but that's the last of the big stuff. This morning I had the realization that we have nowhere to keep baby feeding supplies- bottles n' such- and thus need to find a solution to that problem.

I had a great run this morning, a real breakthrough. It's been probably 10 weeks since I've run all the way through a workout without walking, and equally as long since I've gone past the 3 mile mark. This morning I ran 3.5 mi straight through, walked 2 blocks, than ran to finish off 4 mi. It's nice to know I still have... something. I can't stay I still have "it." It for me is running 10 mi any day I choose. But I'm still out there, 30+ extra pounds and all.

Ben is 12 again.

Today he turns 12 for the 17th time. I think I did the math right there... yeah.

Join us tomorrow evening on Blood Mountain for the usual shenanigans to celebrate. See you there.

I feel lucky.

Last night's Bradley class (week 10 of 12) was "labor rehearsal." For an hour, our instructor called out "contractions starting!" every two minutes and all 10 ladies tried different positions as our husbands practiced their coaching. It seems sort of silly until you try it, and your husband tells you something about his day during the first fake-contraction, and you realize that it's important to practice so that he doesn't try that during real labor. By the second or third fake-contraction, Ben was a pro.

Now, let me say this. I've always felt like Ben's freaking awesome. But last night, when he was supposed to be giving me relaxing things to think about, he put it all on the table. I just don't know how all of those wonderful images are at the front of his brain- the clouds climbing over mountaintops in Peru, the lapping waves at sunrise in Mexico, the quiet of the desert in Morocco, the darkness of a campsite right on Lake Michigan. They just kept coming. He's good at this. And since I wasn't really in labor, I got to just enjoy it and soak it in, as he whispered the sweetest things on earth and massaged my back.

I'm very, very lucky. Now let's just hope he's not on a plane home from Vegas when this all goes down for real.

Last night when we got home from class Molly had peed on the bed. She hasn't done that in years. So we threw the bedding in the washer and had a camp-out on the living room floor. We both overslept and missed our workouts, but I managed to fit a 1 mile run in. 1 mile. It was a decision forced by time but it seems pretty silly. Either way, every little bit counts.

That's a good kid.

Judi sent me this. T'd be darn happy if this was my kid.

Stuck in 1998. And nesting.

I got an email from my friend Tim (who I know from DC) last night. "I am at Madison Square Garden to see The Arcade Fire and all I can think is that the 9:30 feels like its a million miles away and two lifetimes ago." It's funny that this came the same day I was listening to Lonesome Crowded West and wondering when the bands I liked became un-likable. Though I was partial to the old Black Cat, we saw some darn good shows at both venues. Funny, looking at the Black Cat schedule, some of the bands we saw are still playing there. Some are now solo acts instead of bands though. (David Bazan, Corin Tucker)

Nesting has set in and is taking over. Since we set up the baby room last week, I've been in there every day, sorting and re-sorting clothes and books and toys. Ben put a dirty bike in there and every day I've been prodding him about it. He rightly tells me that the room isn't in use and it should be an ok place to temporarily store a bike. I tell him I don't care, it's the baby's room now, and I don't want any bikes in there any more. I don't know why, it's just the way things need to be. I'm obsessing over storage crates and lighting and we ordered a dawn simulator thingey since the room is windowless and I'm freaked out that the lack of natural light will turn our baby into a vampire bat otherwise. Really, we have weeks to get this stuff done. It's a long list of stuff. I'm tempted to take a day off work and tire myself out and just do it. It needs to be done. It's driving me nuts.

It's August.

(photo by Amy) As of where we're sittin', this baby could come as soon as a month from now, or as late as two months from now. As far as I'm concerned, it could come NOW. The night-time calf cramps, the odd dreams, the achy feet, the sundry vitamins and supplements, the vicious kicks to the ribs... I could live without it. But soldering on is the name of the game.

This weekend, I did too much. Saturday, I went with Audrey to cheer on teammates at Elk Grove. Then I rode up to cheer on Ben and Evan at the pump track. Then I went back to Elk Grove to hang out with some CX season friends. I shattered the month's staying up late record and didn't hit the hay till after 1am. Then Sunday it was all nesting all the time, with cleaning and grocery shopping and all that fun stuff.

But I'm still running. Ben and I went 3 miles this morning, running probably 2.5 of it. Didn't get a ride in this weekend aside from the sprint up to the Garden, but maybe after work... or next weekend...

We got a parking space inside the building as of yesterday. It gives us a home for ~6 of our bikes, which no longer live on the ceiling of the back room, since it's now the baby's room. It also means we have to remember when we get home, for the first time, that there are bikes on the roof. I nominate myself as the first to drive a bike into the garage door. Bound to happen.