halfway there.

ok, so i'm done with 9 weeks of the 18 week training cycle. Just a 17, 18, 20, and 20 to tackle and away we go. Spring must be coming soon. Must.

11 this morning was super easy. The Lakefront Path was closed from North to Grand, though, which I didn't know till I got there, rerouting me through areas I don't know well. Either way, I ran most of the way at marathon pace, which makes me know I can do this, which is good.

Ben's off in Indy with several other folks looking at art bikes. I just don't see the need. Instead Audrey and I enjoyed some Scrabble and Indian food with our favorite canine companion and a stack of great dvds, including my favorite movie, "Josie and the Pussycats."

building sandcastles in the sky.

So, today's the day that my Big Winter Project is either green-lighted or completely shut down. One thread still hangs out there. It's killing me. Ugh. This is a big undertaking and a big risk for us, and at this point it makes me just as overwhelmed to think about having this go through as it is to think of scrapping months of work.

Yesterday for work I threw a press conference that had no press. It took place in a union hall where I parked what was the only foreign car in the lot and felt a twinge of fear for my job being seen walking away from it. I walked into the union hall and the staff was smoking in the building and there were ashtrays on the conference room table. Wowsa. I talked a local paper into running my press release, so we got some coverage. But not a good day.

We had some friends over for a congrats dinner last night. They're escaping Chicago. It's funny how familiar I am with folks leaving town-- in 7 years in DC I went through probably 4 groups of friends because nobody sticks around. I guess leaving Chicago isn't quite as common, but it's completely understandable. They're lucky to have good prospects in San Francisco.

And Wednesday after work Audrey ran with me AGAIN, a 4 miler, this time completely on pace. Hot snakes! This could work out great.

This should be a quiet weekend, but I'm too much of a realist to expect it to stay that way. It's a step-back week, so just 11 mi tomorrow. I have vacation on the mind still, but no chance of making it happen...

nothing good.

(image: Gavin)
I may or may not have mentioned that Yohei, Ben, and I went to this party/gathering thing on Saturday night, but something that stuck in my head came right back when I saw this photo. I mean, look at my expression. It's like Chris was telling me his cat died, but he wasn't.
It's been a while since I've had to make small talk, and thankfully there were enough good friends of mine there (like Amy and Chris) that the talk wasn't all small, yet I found myself answering the "What have you been up to for the past Xnumberofmonths you've been in hiding?" with a simple, "nothing good."
OK, so it's not like nothing good is happening, it's just that it's all happening slowly, and it's not interesting to strangers, and it's about as exciting as this blog has become. I get up, I run, I go to work, I come home, I sit on the couch with Ben and our broken dog. The most exciting thing that happened to me today was that Ben made me coffee and left a note next to it saying "the lotion to keep your motion going," or something like that, that made me giggle a lot and wonder a little. So, it's not like nothing is going on, or that everything going on is bad, but just that there's nothing good enough to be interesting.
In my third Chicago winter I'm learning that this is par for the course. We all disappear for 3-5 months, we all do nothing exciting. I should stop acting like it's a bad thing, it's just a winter thing.
And in the uninteresting news department, I failed once again at a pace run, but this time because I averaged 20 seconds/mile faster than I should have. Which I guess is good, but I still am not meeting the goal of learning how to run at marathon pace.

busy busy.

It's been a crazy whilwind couple days, with Yohei in town and workouts and work and travel... Sunday Amy, Audrey and I went XC skiing- my first and probably last time this year- at Harm's Woods. The snow was good, it was de-facto groomed, and we had a great time. I need to ski more often.

Yesterday ranks as one of my worst travel days ever-- probably #2 only to the day I was stranded in Philly. I was up and out of the house at 4am for a 6:35am flight that was delayed. And delayed. Soon it was supposed to depart at the same time as the 8:40 so I switched, then it was moved up and I switched back. They finally loaded us onto the plane and - bam - it was overweight. They had to call a refueling truck to come take fuel off, which was going to take an hour. My event was at noon and it was pushing it, so I decided to get off the plane and give up. And two other people gave up too. So suddenly the plane wasn't overweight and it left... without me. Crap. So then I got on a 10am instead and finally got there at 11:30, barely made the event, pushed my 2:55 return to the 6pm. Got charged $10 for gas in the rental car that I drove all of 13 mi because I didn't have the receipt. Got on the 6pm flight and it landed early at O'Hare only to not have a gate... for half an hour. UGH. So, so much for that 16 hour day. It's over.

Ran a fast 4 this AM. Looking forward to a quiet night tonight-- if I can catch up on work. Which is a big IF.

bloody maries are the ultimate recovery beverage.

I was so good last night. I went to a girls' night with Claudia and Lisa and we got pedicures (mmm... foot massage...) and then were joined by Jamie for tapas. They ordered pitchers of sangria and I sat there trying to be good, knowing I had 15 coming today. I kept drinking my water instead of the sangria, winning us extra attention from the grinning busboy, and I managed to escape with probably less than 2 glasses under my belt. We had a great time. They went to the bike winter event and I went home to sleeeeeeeep. Because I'm trying to be a good mathlete. Or, more likely, because I know how much it hurts to run long after having too much fun the night before.

Today went the way it should. I ran. It didn't hurt till about 12 miles in. Last week I didn't eat till it was too late, this week I took gu/walk breaks at 5 and 10. The Lakefront Path was plowed and ok from Jackson south till about Oakwood, where the problem was inches of snow blown over and blustery winds. My legs were so cold I wondered if I could even feel them. It's ok though. It's just a run, an excuse to take a long bath, eat a tub or rice and beans, and get personal with a bloody mary. Onward.

sarchastic little things.

I got a letter in the mail yesterday from my work's HQ. As a thank you for my 5 years of service, they sent me a $50 gift certificate to the company's online gift shop- so that I can buy something with our logo on it. (maybe they mean for me to buy my own damn pin?) Seeing as how I love my job SO MUCH lately (*cough*) this definitely will be better used as a reminder pinned to the wall than buying stuff we get too much of for free, anyway.

Thursday night's drinking night for me, since I don't run on Friday, and Dan joined me for some pints and then a tasty big bottle. I miss good beer, so the few times I get it, I drink too much of it. Which is ok too.

I'm supposed to run 15 miles in the SEVERE SNOW BLIZZARD OMYGOD IT'S GOING TO WHITEOUT tomorrow. I love this city.

Back to the vet today to get Molly a new cast. She chewed this week's edition so badly that Ben got out the duct tape to repair it.

weather makes the usual less usual!

I came in from this morning's run to the smell of fresh coffee. Ben left a pot with a note, "hot and yummy," waiting for me. I love the little things he does to support my stupid hobbies/obsessions, it means a lot to me. Molly however was unimpressed and is still giving me the look of death for leaving her home.

Last night, to make up for the miles I missed in the rain yesterday morning, Audrey came over and we ran 4 in the heavy snow. That was TWO runs with Audrey... I'm hoping I've found a new running buddy. Then, this morning, I went out for the 7.

I like to think this morning's run was like running on a popsicle-- every few blocks I'd get to be on the clean iceless stick but mostly it was slick and occasionally slushy, sometimes I slid even in the yaktracks. Times like these it's not about running fast, it's about focusing on just not quitting.

most awesomest inspirational cyclist i know.

On my walk to work this morning, I saw just about the only thing that could make me smile on a rainy day where I'd skipped my run and wasn't happy to exist. A friend of mine tooled down the bike lane, a smile on his face, on a beach-cruiser-esque bike with both front and rear baskets loaded with stuff. Then, a commuter on a MTB blew past him, but he just kept pedaling and smiling.

That was T.C. O'Rourke.

I might have mentioned him before, in summer of 2007, when he was Paris bound. Two years ago, he woke up in April and decided he wanted to ride his bicycle 1200k. He built up a brand new Surly Long Haul Trucker and hitched a ride with us up to the 200k brevet. He rode back to the Metra station to get home after the brevet. Each week he'd go on these long ride adventures and find abandoned things and old bridges and random places. It was his "training" - no intervals, no tempo workouts, just getting out there and seeing the world.

Then, just 4 months after starting this adventure, he rode 1200k in the worst weather Paris-Brest-Paris has ever seen- cold driving rain and blustery winds.

It takes a certain strength of character- one I admittedly lack- to ride brevets. There's no competition, little time clock pressure, just you and pedals and looooooooong hours. I find after about 12 hours I lose motivation. As in, why am I still doing this? Without the competition of a race or some other carrot driving you on, it's just riding and sometimes it's hard to convince yourself why it matters whether you keep going or just stop. Whatever it takes to keep going, T.C. has it.

Today, in the cold rain, he just had a few miles to go, but he has some serious perspective. Wish he had heard when I shouted for him. Man o man, I wish I could do what he did.

House Bunny is like OMG the best movie EVAR!

Chris made me think of this. In a whim of "I'll watch this as research on how anti-feminist movies have become," this ended up in my netflix queue. This movie is LIFE CHANGING. OK, maybe not quite, but it has a great tip in it for how to remember people's names that Ben and I were laughing like mad at last night, a full two weeks after seeing the movie. (Yes, I made him watch it too.) The premise is that you can't love yourself unless you have huge breasts and you're skinny, but then in the end they sort of correct the premise to be more along the lines of "be yourself, just with extra lip gloss." THAT is entertainment. Sorta.

Coach Bob told me to run faster and throw in some intervals, a good tip, since the way to run faster is to run faster. I did. I have that tired-hollow-sorta sad feeling from doing a hard AM workout, something I haven't done in a while. It makes me a procrastinator at work and it makes me really hungry, too.

Happy Presidents' Day

It's funny that Gabriel posted this photo on his blog today. It was on my mind too. I met teammates Zach and Josh at the path for a ride this morning and a little Presidents' Day snafu cut it short and put us back on Northerly Island. Just South of McCormick Place, a police car stopped us and turned us back. President Obama was getting in his helicopter along the lakefront, and no traffic was being allowed through.

So, back on Northerly Island for some loops, and then back to brunch at Wishbone, the same brunch we had after team photo day. Delicious. Only ~16mi though, which barely counts, but today's a "rest day" anyway, right?

Yesterday I did another Computrainer session and then spent the afternoon working on the Fish while Ben and Molly went train chasing. Finally replaced the front derailler, but while the chain was off, pulled and El Duke'd the crankset/rings as well. Now at least the front half of that bike is shiny. I'm so glad to be rid of that XT front derailler. The pinch bolt was strategically placed so that unless you're the owner of a very tightly-bent el-shaped wrench, you pretty much have to pull a ring off to access it. Ugh. Now it's an X-9 instead. SRAM 4 life.

Team Popper is not late-night-compatible.

We went to Allison's gallery opening with Joe, Jenn, and Zach, and then we went to a lovely midnight burlesque with Kim, Joel, Adrian, Erica, Brandon, and Ally, and we didn't get to sleep until about 3am. It's been a reaaaaally long time since we've been out that late- probably last summer- and I know why.

After about 6 hours of sleep, working out sucks. That 14 was probably the hardest run I've done all year. I mean, efffffffff, that was not fun. First time I had to tell myself to shut up and keep going.

Molly's not liking being left home. But as usual, she likes me being on the computer even less.

homeskillets.

a fast 4 miler this morning, then to MKE for work. We got some coverage on two tv channels, which was nice, and I visited my mom, and came home again for some family time.

I was very sad to see a picket line at Woodman's. It's my source for random cheap canned beer, and we're running low. I would never cross a line though, not even for beer!, and I googled it and found this. I hope they come to quick resolution on forming their union and getting a first contract. I could really use some Pig's Eye Lean, and in this economy we could all use a solid union job and some cheap beer.

Got home in reasonable time for some do-nothing couch sitting. This is how our home times roll. Ben's indoor workout. Molly competing for attention. TV. Cooking. Drinking. I love Thursday nights because I don't have to run Friday morning. It's quite relaxing.

doing the double.

Yesterday morning I ran 4 in my skirt. Felt great. Then, come afternoon, it was 60 and lovely. Weather called for rain for my 7miler this AM, so I decided to suck it up and run a double yesterday. It was hard.

Audrey joined me for the first 3 of the evening's 7, and I purposefully ran slower than either of us can/should just to make sure she'd come back-- it was our first time running together since last fall's 5k and I wouldn't mind having a running buddy, but going out at pace with a new buddy who hasn't run 3mi since last fall wasn't going to make a second date too likely.

Then, she went to the gym and I kept going. On an empty stomach, trying to shave 2:00/mi off the pace I started at, after running 4 that morning. Ugh. I did manage to finish those last 4 miles at :30/mi below pace, a full 2:30/mi faster than the first three miles, trying to shave some time and make up, but I also managed my first foot blister and some pretty angry legs. It was more of a tempo run than a pace run, and it hurt.

Either way, that allowed me to sleep in a little and give the dog a little more love this morning. Which is always good. Even in the rain, it's always sunshine and rainbows.

it's a big lie.

It's not 60 degrees out. It's 30. It will be 30 tomorrow, and next week, and then the week after it will be 8 degrees and snowy. Must... not... rely. It feels odd running in shorts and even more odd having to manage my hair without a hat. It feels fantastic to have routes determined by where I want to go as opposed to where they've shoveled the snow.

Molly's vet called yesterday to check in. She said if Molly can't stay off her leg, we should give her sedatives to get her to stop jumping around. So Molly slept well last night, and I reclaimed my territory on the bed, and in revolt she slept with her head on my hip, which was ok.

Times are tough.

(image: Audrey)
While I've spent the weekend being all emo, missing my running buddy on my Sunday make-up long run, what's really not helping is the effect Molly's broken leg has had on the amount of sleep I get.

In short, she's not sleeping well, and she's taking up more of the bed/covers, so I'm not sleeping well.

Saturday night her pain pills must have worn off, since at 3am she was up wailing and then just stood there on the bed for about 2 hours. It's rather hard to sleep when there's a dog whining and standing there.

Then, last night, she just decided to take up most of the bed. How can you say no? I used to shove her over, which worked, but with a cast on, I feel bad. I let her take my covers and most of my side of the bed and instead put warm pj's on to make up for it. I'm a sucker.

The lack of sleep naturally makes emotional mountains out of molehills, and along with missing her company on the runs (and hating how people are catcalling me now that I don't have a pitbull by my side), I'm also just generally sad and overwhelmed at running-sans-Molly. Molly was the reason I started running, Molly pushed me out the door to get the job done, Molly smiled when I say the word "run." Now what? I need some sleep before making any decisions.

I should also mention that there's a tail-less squirrel that lives on our block and drives Molly crazy. Yes, she wants to chase it, still.

Get better, Mollyolly.

Of course on the first nice day of the year, something had to go wrong.

I was Eastbound on 18th headed for the Metra station overpass to the lake front path when a Mercedes SUV started honking at me and rolled down its window. I paused.
"Do you know how to get back to the freeway?"
"North on Indiana here, then left on Roosevelt."
Molly saw a squirrel and started fidgeting, unhappy that we had stopped.
"Can't I go left up there?"
"No, it's a dead end."
She darted up the tree behind the squirrel, about 8' high, nothing new, and fell out of the tree, nothing new. Only, this tree was in a treebox that had a 1' high metal railing around it... you know, to keep dogs out. DOIIIOIOIOING! She came down right onto the rail and made a terrible sound.
"So how do I get there again?"
Seriously, my dog's pretty injured and you not only don't care but you're still wondering the most scenic way back to the Dan Ryan? I started freaking out over Molly and they just drove away.

Molly wouldn't run anymore, obviously. She wasn't bleeding but was having a bad time of it. 3.5 mi into the run, no phone on me, no money on me, a mudball of an injured pitbull and me. Ben had the car, off with my teammates riding farm fields. I had no ride, no money, no phone. Flagged a cab.
"I ain't taking that muddy dog. He looks mean."
Flagged another cab.
"I just washed my car."
Third cab I gave a sob story too, offered to "make it worth his time" and loaded her in. Took my shirt off and used it to clean up the Mollymess. Borrowed $20 from our doorman to pay the cab, took Molly home, took the $20 to the doorman, and started calling. Vet? Open. Who has a car to get Molly there? Called Audrey like 4 times, waking her. She swung by, we took Molly to the vet, and about 3 hours later left with Molly's right rear leg in a cast and a warning that we need to keep an eye on her for the next day in case of lung issues. She'll be ok, but there goes the vacation fund, and there goes the run, but at least she's ok. She's off running for 6 weeks, and I'm going to miss my buddy, but at least she's ok.

Super thanks to Audrey, who totally saved us today.

the totally deceptive question: Is it over?

I'm still not used to Chicago winter. After 7 yrs of mild DC winters, I spend most of February and March trying to predict whether or not winter is over. It's been more than 10 degrees for a full week and this weekend it might hit 50. Is it over?

See, this is the worst question ever, since when the answer is "no," it makes the winter even worse than it was before I asked the question. It keeps coming back for more, leaving, coming back again, and clobbering me with misery. Bah.

Last year it was snowing during a run in early March, which is a good 4 weeks from now. So I'm not allowed to look at the 10 day forecast and say YESSSSSSSSSS without knowing something nasty is on the other side. Jerks. C'mon global warming.

we're supposed to be tired.

I read the blog of Joe Friel (of Training Bible fame), who has some great framing thoughts today about what it is we're all up to when we get up at 6am and run till it hurts, and then get "tired." Basically, fatigue is a sign of achieving fitness, and that it's part of training. In other words, I need to suck it up!

Pace run this morning once again came in too fast - 13 sec/mile faster than pace- and ended up looking more like a Tempo. Maybe I'm underestimating my pace? Hard to tell when distances haven't hit even 15 yet. Vamos a ver.

laydeeez!

(photo: Amy)
6 of the women of Half Acre took over the trainers last night and had a sweaty good time. Well, ok, two of us bonked from not enough food, one of us ended up killing both derailler cables and rode it singlespeed, one of us rode it fixed, one of us had a wheel slip in forward facing dropouts and we didn't figure that out till the smell of burnt tire filled the air, but still... watch out! We're crafty. Next time it's a serious game-on. Forreals.

I think you might be noticing that we're quite the little social club, both the Half Acre women and our team in general. It's true. We ride together alot and hang out together alot. It's not part of the contract- the hanging out part- but it's just what we do, since we like eachother, and fun is good! I'm really enjoying it. It's actually a huge motivator, since I'm all about social hour and social hour comes from hard work on the bike. But then again... I'm training for a marathon right now, ya?

Overdoing it is something I specialize in. I mean, if you're going to do something, do it to excess, right? Well, this little personality trait (flaw? naw!) leads to regular cycles of burnout and I think the heavy training mixed with life stress has landed me right in the bottom of a pit of cranky, tired, sighing-nonstop burnout. A small pit, mind you, by my standards, but something about that 12 miler, hour of stairclimb, more running, hour on the computrainer, not sleeping well, plus insane workweek is making me not quite me. I need my sunshine and rainbows back.

more cold weather running. what to wear?

It's like every time the weather changes I'm back to square one-- what the hell did I wear two weeks ago when it was freaking cold out? This morning NPR said 2 degrees with -10 windchill and I was perplexed and what I needed to don to do battle with the eyelash-icicle weather.

So, I made a chart. It's flexible, of course, but it's about what I wear. Hopefully I won't forget now. It's amazing, I see runners in all weather in all sorts of different clothes- this weekend on the LFP runners ranged from shorts n' sweatshirt to full sweatsuits and down jackets. But this is what works for me. I think the key is wool - stays warm and wicks. I'm avoiding product placements here but I have some serious favorites in each category...

Please ignore the cinnamon-y Old Man Scent today. The tiger balm is serving an important dual role of untying the knots in my calves and helping me battle a cold. It's official -- I overdid it on the stairs. Huh.

(today is going to suck)

(photo stolen from here.)
For Sunday cross-training this week, I decided to climb the stairs in my building, 10 stories, up and down for an hour. By the 8th floor I'd be in the 180's and dripping, back at the bottom I'd be at 130 and ready to go again-- going down made for great intervals. I climbed a total of 140 floors up and then back down down, or 290 flights up and down, more than the Sears Tower. My legs were shaking when I was done.
Then Amanda, Audrey, Erica, my brother Scott and I went to the Chinatown parade and subsequently gorged ourselves on dim sum. Then we went to Dan and Lisa's for the big game, where I managed to down 4 High Life tallboys and 3 mini-cupcakes and not eat dinner. Oh, and they have a cat and I'm allergic.
So you see where this is all leading... I couldn't sleep at all last night between the trouble breathing from the cat and the cramps in my calves from the stairs. At 5am I threw in the towel and sucked on my inhaler till my breathing was back in line, which resulted in me waking up with a mix of cramping legs, hangover, and steroid-induced twitching and jittery-ness. A great combination for a Monday morning.
And that's my story. Today is going to suck.

...I nearly cried at JP's blog about Worlds. It was a stellar day for Wisconsinite Brian Matter and a plain old crap day for Jonny. But it's over for now. Ben just started training yesterday for a season that starts in 7 mos.