5 week burnout.

5 weeks, halfway done with maternity leave. The idea of showing up to work at this point is terrifying. I really hope things settle in better.

Elliot's getting more alert and interactive and seems to be moving from the newborn/alien phase to something more human and, well, interesting to be around. Unfortunately, both he and I got a lovely cold this weekend and he's spent the last day hacking and sneezing and snorting his own snot. Last night he'd breathe loud and snort a lot, then fall silent. All night I was rolling over to make sure he was still alive after those snotty episodes. Yarg.

Sunday Dan and I hit Palos and it was, of course, divine. I'm slowly upping my running mileage too, from nearly nothing to slightly more than nearly nothing. I'm plowing through 5k's now and adding speedwork of sorts to try to get my stride and pace back. I registered for the Indy Mini (next May) and would normally qualify for preferred start, no problem, but since I haven't raced all year I have no finish times to show. Now I'm super slow and worried about throwing down a qualifying time by March. So naturally I went out for a run while sick yesterday, leaving me a complete burned out wreck last night. (Balance? What's that?) Either way, something's working. I wore a pair of pre-pregnancy jeans yesterday and it felt amazing.

In trying to tackle this cold, I realized that since I'm nursing I can't just suck on a bottle of dayquil. I went to whole foods and got some medicinal tea, only to learn that two of the ingredients have negative effects on milk supply. Yarg. I really, really had no idea being a mom was so damn hard. Totally worth it of course, but amazingly hard.